Archive for 2004

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Sunday, September 26, 2004

 

Senate Candidate Sterilized Under-Age Women

`In an interview this week on KRMG-AM in Tulsa, Dr. Coburn was asked, “To your knowledge, could this situation have happened or has happened with any other women?”

He replied: “I’ve done this lots to women who have come in with emergency things who have asked me to sterilize them, under-age. When they’ve already had three babies.”‘


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Reflectoporn

`The name reflectoporn was given to pictures who were discovered on e-bay, where you can see naked people in the reflection of any material that shines. Like televisions, kettles, mirrors, etc. Reflectoporn is getting more and more popular.’


Cop Demands Mom Turn Over Daughter

`A Long Island traffic cop has been arrested and accused of trying to lure a 13-year-old girl into a public bathroom.

Police say the officer from North Hempstead threatened a mother with a parking ticket unless she handed over her daughter.

[..] “If she wanted to take care of the ticket, her 13-year-old daughter would have to accompany him to a nearby restroom.”‘


Quebec man killed in crash while having sex

`A 25-year-old man was killed and his partner was seriously injured Friday in a head-on crash that police said took place while the driver was having sex behind the wheel.

Another car veered into the couple’s path in this town 25 kilometres northeast of Quebec City, shattering both vehicles and trapping the occupants.’


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Saturday, September 25, 2004

 

Historical Pirate Flags

`While the precise origin of the pirate flag is unknown, its ancestry can be traced with some certainty. They were used to intimidate the enemy or victim, and the flag was designed to conjure up fear and dread. It was an important part of the pirate armoury, and was the pirate’s best form of psychological warfare, especially when combined with a preceding reputation of not showing any quarter if opposed.’


Pickup Lines

`Are your legs tired, because you’ve been running through my mind all day long.

Girl, you better have a license, cuz you are driving me crazy!

If you were a booger I’d pick you first.’


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Men Attacked with Chainsaw

`”I was scared,” Kung said. “I’m not going lie. Anyone who says they weren’t scared getting chased with a chainsaw is a lie.”‘


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The Eradicator

A weapon for the office.


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Teacher Sends Boy Home With Feces in Bag

`A teacher is on paid administrative leave after sending a first-grader home with feces in his backpack because the boy soiled the classroom floor.

The teacher apparently was frustrated with the 6-year-old student’s actions so she wrapped up the waste and sent it home with the boy Tuesday along with a note [..]’


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Friday Feature: You’re All Morons

`Greetings and suck me. I’m Jeff Woods, maintenance programmer for Star Wars Galaxies: An Empire Divided. As a maintenance programmer it is my responsibility to manage existing code, write bug fixes, integrate new code while analyzing its impact on existing functionality and be the brunt of your jokes and flames on the forums. Suck me. I’m writing this Friday Feature because I’m about sick of your, the valued customer’s, torrent of never ending sass-mouth and ill-informed crap. I repeat, suck me. Suck me long. Suck me hard.’


The Museum Of Bad Art

`The Museum Of Bad Art (MOBA) is the world’s only museum dedicated to the collection, preservation, exhibition and celebration of bad art in all its forms.’


BMW Unveils World’s Fastest Hydrogen-Powered Car

`German luxury carmaker BMW unveiled the world’s fastest hydrogen-powered car at the Paris auto show on Wednesday, dubbed the H2R, capable of exceeding 300 kilometers (185 miles) per hour.’


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Touchscreen Hack Effort Called ‘Monkey Business’

`Critics of the Diebold touch-screen voting machines turned their attention Wednesday from the machines themselves to the computers that will tally the final vote, saying the outcome is so easy to manipulate that even a monkey could do it.

And they showed video of a monkey hacking the system to prove it. [..]

The entire voting record can be deleted by choosing “reset the election” on a drop-down menu [..]’

Here’s the monkey video. (7meg Quicktime)


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The Hitchhiker Adventure Game

20th Anniversary Edition


[quiz] Dog Toy or Marital Aid?


Smallest ‘guitar string’ to weigh atoms

`The string, developed at Cornell University, US, is only 10 atoms across, a million times smaller than a normal guitar string.

It is made from a carbon nanotube, formed from a sheet of carbon one atom thick and rolled into a cylinder.’


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Sinead O’Connor Pleads For People To Stop Calling Her Crazy

`Sinead O’Connor has taken out a full-page ad to proclaim her sanity. [..]

The 2,000 essay also asks “If ye all think I am such a crazy person why do ye use me to sell your papers?”‘


Friday, September 24, 2004

 

Examples of real 999 calls

`My wife left me with two salmon sandwiches which was left over from last night and I’m sat in a chair here and she’s out there decorating. She won’t put any food on or anything for anybody [..]’


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Tourist Photo


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SkinBag

`Each SkinBag is handmade on demand.

• Material : synthetic human skin
• Colour : available in all shades of human skin colour
b l a c k , a s i a n , p i n k w h i t e , m i x e d …’


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Five ways to impress your girlfriend

Again, if anyone asks, I suggest you invoke the “Ancient Practice!” clause. 🙂


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Labia Stretching

I just like the way they’ve used “ANCIENT PRACTICE” as a caption for that photo. 🙂 It’s safe for work: just yell “Ancient Practice!” if anyone asks what you’re looking up on the web.


Mandonna

`the all-male all-live tribute to the material girl!’

with videos. 🙂


SingleNinjas.com

`This site is for fellow Ninjas to get together to meet and to have fun! So whether you’re looking for a new training partner or someone to help you with your next assassination attempt, you’ll be sure to find them right here!!’


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Jump’n’Rhyme

German hip-hop side-scrolling shooter. The music is just grand. 🙂


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Steer Clear of Lloyd in the Brown Car

`According to UK internet car insurer,esure, your first name and the colour of car that you choose can make a big difference to how likely you are to make a claim on your car insurance.

Almost a third (30%) of men called Lloyd are likely to make a claim on their car insurance over the course of a year, and the same is true of more than a third (35%) of women named Natasha.’


Elton John calls Taiwan media `vile pigs’

`”Do you know what that means? Rude, vile pigs. That’s what all of you are.”

One of the photographers shouted back: “Why don’t you get out of Taiwan?”

John replied: “We’d love to get out of Taiwan if it’s full of people like you. Pig! Pig!”‘


Klingons for Kerry

`The poll, conducted when the DVD release of the Star Trek fan documentary Trekkies 2 attracted Portland’s Klingon community [..], may spell trouble for President George W. Bush. [..]

“On the home world, if there had been a contested election between Gore and Bush, the honorable thing would be for Gore to kill Bush,” explained Khraanik (Earth name: Jason Lewis), a 38-year-old from Southeast Portland.’


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Police Arrest Suspect In Umbrella Killing

`A Bridgeport man has been charged with manslaughter, accused of killing another man with an umbrella. [..]

Luther Williams, 50, died at Bridgeport Hospital Tuesday as a result of a traumatic brain injury suffered in the attack.

According to police, Williams and Hill were arguing on a Bridgeport street about money. Police said that Hill, who was carrying an umbrella, swung it around and plunged it into Williams’ eye.’


Handspringing protester damages art in Germany

`Yelling loudly, the 35-year-old woman attacked “Office Baroque,” a cutout section of wall by American artist Gordon Matta-Clark, doing a series of head-over-heels flips before landing on the work in a handstand, punching both her arms through the drywall, said Klaus Dieter Lehmann, president of Berlin’s Prussian Cultural Heritage Foundation.’


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