Archive for February, 2005

trademarkstools

Saturday, February 26, 2005

 

Burglars report getaway-car keys stolen

`When two Danish burglars realized someone had stolen the keys to their getaway car, they reacted like honest citizens and called the police.

Police said they were only too happy to help, and arrested them after they confessed to breaking and entering.’


about

DR Congo plague outbreak spreads

`An outbreak of what tests suggest is pneumonic plague has spread to a second town in the Democratic Republic of Congo, according to a medical charity. [..]

Thousands have fled the remote diamond mining town of Zobia since the disease first emerged at the end of last year.

At least 60 people have died so far. The plague affects victims lungs and is fatal if left untreated.’


Courtroom drama custody ruling

`A seven year old boy was at the centre of a courtroom drama today when he challenged a court ruling over who should have custody of him.

The boy has a history of being beaten by his parents and the judge awarded custody to his aunt.

The boy however confirmed that his aunt beat him more than his parents, and refused to live there. When the judge suggested that he live with his grandparents the boy cried out that they beat him more than anyone.’


news

Thompson ‘made this choice’

`Hunter S. Thompson died Sunday as he planned: surrounded by his family, at a high point in his life, and with a single, courageous and fatal gunshot wound to the head, his son says.

His son and daughter-in-law could not be sadder. And they could not be prouder.

“Hunter did not do this in a moment of fear, desperation or despair. He certainly had those moments in his life,” Juan Thompson said Wednesday night as he sat on a couch next to his wife in the guest cabin adjacent to his father’s house.

But, he added, “He decided he’d done good work and was respected. His reputation as a serious writer has solidified.”‘


Pakistan Army told to fire at intruding Americans

`Pakistan has issued new rules of engagement permitting its Army to fire at US forces that cross the border from Afghanistan without coordinating first, according to a report contributed to the magazine ‘American Conservative’ by a former CIA officer.

Philip Giraldi, now an international security consultant and writer of intelligence matters, writes in the February 28 issue of the magazine’s ‘Deep Background’ column that “President Musharraf has been receiving angry reports from his military that US forces have been engaging in hot pursuit across the border in violation of bilateral agreements.’


He’s maced after asking cops to help dying dog

`A Brooklyn man was pepper-sprayed when he brought his dying dog to his local police precinct, it was revealed yesterday.

Jaime Johnson, 30, a maintenance worker from Bedford-Stuyvesant, claims he was unfairly treated by cops. [..]

Johnson says he pleaded with cops to get an ambulance for the dog.

“Within three minutes of [getting] there, I was blinded for the rest of the day,” said Johnson, who denied he was drunk.’


Doing It Doggy Style

Relatively safe for work, because it’s an actual dog. 🙂

(1meg .wmv)


marketing

Thursday, February 24, 2005

 

Google H4x0r


guidelines

Jackie: I was going to call the Queen to complain

`Jackie Stallone says she was going to phone the Queen to complain about the British press after she appeared in Celebrity Big Brother.

She said she found the articles written about her after she was evicted from the house hard to deal with reports OK! magazine.

She said: “I almost got hysterical. I didn’t get out of bed for two days. I had to take valium. I was going to call Queen Elizabeth. I was so outraged by the whole thing. I was going to tell her that she shouldn’t allow this in her country.”‘


Kiwi Health and Safety manual for prostitutes

`In situations where more than one worker is providing service to a client (e.g. threesomes) it is necessary to ensure that equipment such as vibrators and dildos is not used by one person and then another without being cleaned, disinfected and having a new condom put on first. Ideally each worker should have her/his own toys and equipment, which are not used by other workers. Each worker may choose to use a condom of a different colour in order to identify who has used the dildo last.’


report

Lonely bride rescued

`A woman married a man from the congregation after her intended groom walked out on her at the last minute.

The woman, known as Suggi, asked for a replacement when her future husband got cold feet reports the Mirror.

He claimed she was not the girl he had been introduced to before the arranged marriage in Mirzapur, India.

Suggi’s parents approved of the man called Balram, who stepped forward from the congregation, and the couple married.’


trademarks

Bush: Attack on Iran ‘ridiculous’

`U.S. President George W. Bush said Tuesday that it is “simply ridiculous” to assume that the United States has plans to attack Iran over its alleged nuclear weapons program after discussing the issue with European allies.

“This notion that the United States is getting ready to attack Iran is simply ridiculous. Having said that, all options are on the table,” Bush said.’

“The notion that Bush is a lying sack of shit is simply ridiculous. Having said that, all options are on the table,” Moonbuggy said.


tools

The Great War In Color

A bunch of images.


about

Robber Busted By Bragging On Live Radio

`A Chicago man is facing bank robbery charges after authorities say he called into a Chicago radio station and bragged about the heist. The robbery at a TCF Bank in Chicago last April went unsolved until a bank worker heard the man’s call to a popular confessions show. The caller bragged that he and five others tied up employees and got away with $81,000. A bank worker recognized details from the confession as matching the hold-up at her bank and called authorities.’


Piss Off

`When Johan Vande Lanotte, Belgium’s Vice Prime Minister, goes to the toilets today, he finds the urinals in the offices of his ministry decorated with stickers. They show an American flag and the head of George W. Bush. “Go ahead. Piss on me,” the caption says. Vande Lanotte is one of Bush’s hosts in Brussels. Is peeing on your guest’s head appropriate? In Belgium it is. After all, Brussels’ best known statue is that of “Manneken Pis,” a peeing boy.’


news

Total Immersion

Demonstration of some cool realtime graphics thingy.


Breast size determines personality

`An Italian sex researcher claims he can tell a woman’s personality from the size and shape of her breasts.

According to German newspaper Bild sexologist Piero Lorenzoni said: “A woman’s breasts denote a woman’s character, just like her star sign.”

He has categorised breast types according to fruits and says men can draw up their own horoscope-type chart that indicates what a woman’s chest size says about her.’


Wednesday, February 23, 2005

 

Weak arm of the law

‘Japanese Prime Minister Junichiro Koizumi has urged police to toughen up after a television news report showed two police officers fleeing from a man brandishing what appeared to be a baseball bat.

“When the culprit came towards them, they didn’t try to restrain him but ran away. I was surprised and amazed when I saw this,” Koizumi told reporters.’

more here, with pictures and video.


Nature Calls

(2.3meg shockwave)


marketing

Six People In Van Survive Plunge Down 400-Foot Slope

`”I just remember as we were sliding, it seemed slow,” Terry Holman said Tuesday on NBC’s “Today” show. “I kept hoping it would grab and come back the other way. When it didn’t and started to fall, I just thought we were done for.”

Holman and the others were on 11,018-foot Red Mountain Pass in southwestern Colorado on Saturday when Joe Sullivan’s minivan slid on a patch of ice. The van carried Sullivan, his wife, son and daughter as well as Holman and Holman’s daughter, Stacia.

Sullivan recalls shouting as the vehicle tumbled down the 60-degree slope. It rolled twice, maybe more, before coming to rest with the driver’s side facing down.’

with some pictures.


guidelines

Little Homies


How to Cut…

`I’m always flabbergasted when I observe a cooking teacher with poor knife skills. Unfortunately, it’s all too common. I even occasionally observe a professional cook, even in France, with poor knife skills, although this is a less common occurrence. In my opinion, good knife skills are an essential component of being a good cook. And good knife skills are not particularly difficult for the average person to learn.

Good knife skills are a combination of knowledge and practice—the knowledge of which knives to use for which tasks, the knowledge of how to hold and move a knife, the knowledge of how various foods are structurally composed, and many other little bits of knowledge. But being thoroughly indoctrinated with knowledge will mean little if not accompanied by lots of practice. Like any other skill, speed and competence come with practice.’


report

Man Arrives At Court Naked To Face Indecent Exposure Charges

`An environmental protester facing indecent exposure charges came to court exposing the naked truth.

Simon Oosterman, 24, arrived at Auckland’s District Court naked — but he got dressed before he entered the courtroom Thursday.

The computer technician was charged during the Auckland Naked Bike Ride last Sunday, an event he organized to protest society’s dependence on cars.

When Oosterman was stopped by police during the naked bike ride, other riders covered the lower parts of their bodies to avoid arrest.’


trademarks

Camilla Banned From White House

`George Bush has banned Camilla Parker Bowles from the White House – because she is a divorcee.

The unprecedented snub has effectively sabotaged Charles’s plan to take his bride on a Royal tour of America later this year.

The trip would have been the pair’s first official tour as a married couple.

But the US President – a notoriously right-wing Christian and reformed alcoholic – told aides it was “inappropriate” for him to be playing host to the newly-weds, who are both divorcees.’


tools

Placenta Prints

`They start with a placenta and some sketching paper…and here’s how they are made…’


about

Disco Ascenseur


The Man with the Smallest Penis in Existence and the Electron Microscope Technician Who Loved Him


news

Author wanted ashes ‘shot from cannon’

`[..] Hunter S. Thompson, who committed suicide last weekend, wanted his ashes to be fire from a cannon following his funeral, a friend said today.

While no funeral or memorial service arrangements for the legendary gun-toting adventurer have yet been announced, the author made his last wishes clear before his death, friend Troy Hooper said.’


The Blue Flash

A DIY rollercoaster.

`John Ivers the builder of the Blue Flash has also gotten world wide press from the BBC to television, radio and newspaper articles. [..]

The Blue Flash was his first experiment in coaster building but he learned his lessons from it and now has just started on his second coaster that will go around his garden.’


Paris Hilton Lesbian Porn