Archive for June, 2005

Tuesday, June 7, 2005

 

Tom Cruise goes apeshit on Oprah

Tom Cruise is an idiot. Oprah is an idiot. Basically, they both need to be shot. Luckily, living in America, they probably will be shot sooner or later. 🙂

Katie Holmes is kinda cute tho. Tho, hanging out with Tom and Oprah makes her an idiot as well.

(9meg .wmv)


Perversion for Profit (Part I)

‘Anti-pornography film produced by financier Charles Keating, linking pornography to the Communist conspiracy and the decline of Western civilization.’

Also, Perversion for Profit (Part II).

Various sized downloads.

see it here »


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Anal Ring Toss

`For some serious entertainment use the X-rated ring toss. The small 2 inch long .75 inch diameter silicone butt plug goes in their rear while others throw the the yellow rings at the anal stick. The one with the most ringers wins! Comes with 3 rings and anal plug with stick. Sounds like fun for the whole party.’

Labelling it “not safe for work” is probably redundant, given the title and description. 🙂


Monday, June 6, 2005

 

Woman killed for ‘playing TV too loud’

`A Sydney man stabbed his flatmate to death because she would not turn down the television or stereo while he was trying to sleep, a court has been told.

Jeffrey Dunn today pleaded not guilty in the NSW Supreme Court to murdering his flatmate Jacqueline Dowd at Cartwright, in western Sydney, on March 12, 2004.

However, the 60-year-old pleaded guilty to manslaughter due to provocation. [..]

“I tried to sleep and she turned the television on, then she turned the stereo on,” Mr Conlon said Dunn told police.

“I said, ‘look Jacqui if you don’t shut up I’m going to kill you’.”‘


Hackers plot to create massive botnet

`Computer Associates has warned of a co-ordinated malware attack (CMA) described as among the most sophisticated yet unleashed on the net. The attack involves three different Trojans – Glieder, Fantibag and Mitglieder – in a co-ordinated assault designed to establish a huge botnet under the control of hackers. CA reckons that access to the compromised PCs is for sale on a black market, at prices as low as five cents per PC.

CA security researchers reckon the three items of malware have been combined to maximise the potency of the overall assault. [..]’


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Police ‘free’ S&M sex slave from car trunk

`Police ‘free’ S&M sex slave from car trunk – Yahoo! News: “German police, alerted to a potential kidnapping, ‘freed’ a man from a car trunk only to discover the would-be victim was actually a willing sex slave, authorities said Thursday.

Police stopped the car after a concerned caller told them he had seen a woman locking someone in the boot. However, on opening it, they were greeted by the sight of the 39-year-old man wearing nothing but a leather thong and a collar.’


handbook

Photos Of An Unknown Family Who Probably Owned A Liquor Store

`A couple of weekends ago, we were nonchalantly (as opposed to chalantly) strolling down the hallowed aisles of the G.W.S.M. when a moldy stack of photos piled on a couple of photo albums caught our collective eye.

To make a medium story almost non-existent, we purchased two hefty photo albums filled-to-the-brim with family photos of a hitherto unknown family. We haven’t yet taken the time to look at the back of every photo to try to figure out the family’s name. We have noticed that a lot of the photos feature family members standing in or in front of a nice-looking, fully-stocked liquor store.

It’s quite obvious that the family pictured in the photo albums owned the liquor store

HOWEVER…

It’s entirely possible that the “unknown family” simply liked having their photos taken in and around the liquor store.’


help

Quotes from The American Taliban

Things various American conservatives have said. These people are _scary_.

“We should invade their countries, kill their leaders and convert them to Christianity. We weren’t punctilious about locating and punishing only Hitler and his top officers. We carpet-bombed German cities; we killed civilians. That’s war. And this is war.” [..]

“When science and the Bible differ, science has obviously misinterpreted its data.” [..]

“I would like to outlaw contraception…contraception is disgusting – people using each other for pleasure.” [..]

“I’m an old-fashioned woman. Men should take care of women, and if men were taking care of women today, we wouldn’t have to vote.” [..]

“Just like what Nazi Germany did to the Jews, so liberal America is now doing to the evangelical Christians. It’s no different…More terrible than anything suffered by any minority in history.” [..]

“I think that actually AIDS is a guardian. That is I think it was sent, if you would, about forty years ago, to destroy Western civilization unless we change our sexual ways. So it’s really a Godsend.” [..]

“When I, or people like me, are running the country, you’d better flee, because we will find you, we will try you, and we’ll execute you. I mean every word of it. I will make it part of my mission to see to it that they are tried and executed.”

I’m glad I live far, far away.


conditions

BaitCar.com

`A bait car is a vehicle of any type that is owned by the police and is intended to be stolen. It is parked in high auto crime areas and left there, sometimes for an hour, other times for days. Once the vehicle is stolen, police are immediately dispatched to the moving bait car. Once police are following the bait car, the engine is disabled remotely and the suspects are arrested. Everything that is said and done by the suspects inside the bait car is recorded on audio and video which is used for court purposes. The bait car program began in Greater Vancouver on May 1, 2004 and was expanded to Vancouver Island in April 2005. A further expansion to the interior of BC is under active discussion.’

with videos.


marketing

Sunday, June 5, 2005

 

Darth Vader shows his dark side

`Police in Malaysia are hunting a man who flashes women while wearing a Darth Vader costume. [..]

Priscilla, 33, a factory supervisor, said the man got out of his car, strutted about menacingly in his Darth Vader suit before flashing to 15 women workers standing at a bus stop at 7am.

“At first, I thought he was a die-hard Star Wars fan trying to impress us with his costume. But we were shocked when he showed us his private parts,” she told Malaysia’s Star newspaper. [..]

“Next time it will not be Revenge of the Sith but revenge on a sick man if we catch him doing his act again,” Priscilla added.’


information

Zen And The Art Of Small Claims

`You know those obnoxious recorded calls you get advertising credit cards or free vacations or auto-glass replacement? Those are illegal. So are junk faxes. In Washington State, so is commercial email with misleading headers. Every time you get one of these, the offending party owes you $500. Rather than just hang up, recycle or delete, I’ve been filing small claims against these obnoxious marketers. This page will track my progress and give some tips on how to collect $500 every time a company forces their illegal marketing tactics upon you.’


CD Lamp

`At a previous job, the head of QA had several stacks of several hundred CDs on the floor in front of floor to ceiling windows. The sunlight shining through the window would glow through these CDs in a very appealing manner that made the green light seam warm. From that point forward I always thought that a stack of CDs with a tubular light inside would make a very cool lamp.’


Stage set for ‘.xxx’ Internet addresses

`The Internet’s primary oversight body approved a plan Wednesday to create a virtual red-light district, setting the stage for pornographic Web sites to use new addresses ending in ‘xxx’ [..]

Adult-oriented sites, a $12 billion industry, probably could begin buying “xxx” addresses as early as fall or winter depending on ICM’s plans, ICANN spokesman Kieran Baker said.’


WARNING, everyone MUST READ!!!!

`I must say folks last night was the most intense night of my life. I was released from the hospital this morning, the doctor said i was lucky to be alive. With furthur tests i might have suffered slight brain damage, the doctors are at this moment unsure.

Yesterday me and a few buddies decided to drop acid, and during our trip we decide to smoke bowls. We were having a great time up until my friend said ‘hey i heard on a phish board that if you put gasoline in the bong it will get you way faded.”


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Celine Dion Cover’s Michael Jackson’s `Bad’

Stupid bitch. 🙂

(2meg mpeg)


Goodbye Bitch!

`Say “Goodbye” to your Lover. Use this handy letter generator and you will never have to talk to them again!’


Man gets tricked into thinking a zombie apocalypse

(12meg .wmv)


store

Student in yearbook identified only as ‘Black Girl’

`A Texas school district has apologized to a student identified only as ‘Black Girl’ in a high school yearbook photo.

All the White students are identified by name in a photograph of the Waxahachie High School National Honor Society. The teen identified as ‘Black Girl’ is the only Black student in the photo.

A schools spokeswoman says the caption apparently was intended as a placeholder until the yearbook staff could identify the student. She tells a newspaper, the Waxahachie Daily Light, the label was a poor choice, but wasn’t malicious.’


handbook

Life/form® Prostate Examination Simulator

`Here’s an indispensable model for both students and professionals. Teach techniques of prostate examination with NASCO’s Life/form® Prostate Examination Simulator. Now every student can learn to detect beginning stages of prostate cancer and increase chances of patient survival. Four separate prostate glands are supplied with the torso, representing one benign gland and three stages of prostatic carcinoma in varying degrees of development. Each gland can be inserted into the prostate torso to allow realistic practice in diagnosis by rectal palpation.’


help

Woodpecker Thinks Reflection Is Enemy

`Car owners around town are covering their mirrors in an attempt to outsmart a woodpecker who apparently thinks his reflection is an enemy.

Tim Taylor, who owns Thruway Auto Glass, said he replaced 30 smashed mirrors last year and 18 this year because of the bird, which has claimed this area east of Syracuse as his territory. [..]

Anne Miller has had two mirrors on her Pontiac Grand Prix smashed and watched the bird attack her neighbor’s Malibu.

“I told him to shoo. He did. Then he came right back and finished the job,” she said. “Instead of flying off, he walked across the windshield and did the passenger mirror. I was flabbergasted.”‘


conditions

More help for paint sniffers

`A multi-million dollar initiative to curb chroming or paint sniffing amongst Queensland youths will be launched at Tuesday’s state budget.
Queensland premier Peter Beattie said $8.8 million would be used to help stop teenagers inhaling volatile substances such as paint.

‘Places of safety’ in Brisbane, Logan, Townsville, Cairns and Mt Isa will be expanded with the money in an effort to help substance abusers kick the habit.

Mr Beattie said more than 1,800 people had used the service up to March this year.’


marketing

Anti-poverty wristbands produced in sweatshops

`Fashionable wristbands worn by pop stars, actors, top athletes and celebrities to publicise the Make Poverty History campaign are produced in appalling ‘slave labour’ conditions, damning evidence has revealed.

Chinese factory workers producing the white rubber bracelets are forced to toil in conditions that violate Chinese law and the Ethical Trading Initiative (ETI) set up to establish international standards for working conditions.

The revelations are laid bare in sensitive ‘ethical audits’ of factories that make the must-have fashion accessories for the national Make Poverty History campaign begun by a partnership of over 400 charities.’


information

Star Wars Episode III: a steaming pile of Sith.

Maddox reviews Star Wars III. Contains spoilers, but the film was pretty much spoilt from it’s inception because George Lucas is an idiot, so read it anyway. 🙂


A brief history of: www.stupidlylongurlthatyoucannotrememberasweregistereditwhilepissed.com


Thursday, June 2, 2005

 

Teen Accused Of Having Sex With Dog

`Cory Michael Williamson’s neighbor told sheriff’s deputies that she saw the teen having sexual contact with her 6-month-old dog over the weekend.

Williamson, 17, is now in the Spartanburg County Detention Center charged with buggery. Last year, Williamson was charged with criminal sexual conduct against a 4-year-old girl and a 13-year-old girl.’

He looks kinda confused in the photo.


Wednesday, June 1, 2005

 

PETA Comic Book

`Ask your mommy…

…how many animals she killed to make her fur coat? The sooner she stops wearing fur, the sooner animals will be safe!’

Nothing like mentally scarring some children to make your point. 🙂


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Health risk with G-string pants

`G-string knickers can damage the skin and cause infections, experts in Germany have warned women.

Dr Thomas Gent of the Association of Gynaecologists advised women to wear bigger pants to avoid complications.

He blamed the friction caused by the string part of the underwear for a big rise in the number of patients he had seen reporting genital inflammation.

A UK gynaecologist said it was the ill-fit rather than the underwear type that was the likely root of problem.’


Lifetiles

`Years ago, a fascination with antique optical toys led Rufus Butler Seder to wonder if he could create motion pictures on a grand scale using no electricity, moving parts, or special lighting. After some experiment he developed an 8″ square, lens-ribbed glass tile that was to form the building block for his dream come true. He called it a LIFETILE.

LIFETILES enable Rufus to create “Movies for the Wall”: optical glass-tiled murals that appear to come to life, move, and change when the viewer walks or rides by. The medium is durable, maintenance-free, and lends itself to almost any subject or location, outdoors or in. Since 1990 Rufus has created scores of sizeable works for museums, aquariums and other public places around the world.’


Robots work in swarms and hive

Pictures and links for various robot swarms. Looks kinda cool.


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Elderly Woman Jailed After Repeatedly Calling 911

`Dorothy Densmore, 81, was arrested Sunday afternoon after police said she called 911 dispatchers 20 times in 38 minutes.

She told dispatchers that a local pizza shop refused to deliver a pie to her Charlotte apartment and that someone at the shop called her a “crazy old coot.”

Police spokeswoman Mandy Giannini says when an officer arrived at her apartment, the five-foot-tall, 98-pound woman attacked him.’


handbook