moonbuggy

`Monday’s edition featured an article on Mehmet Ali Ağca, the person responsible for the creation of the bulletproof Popemobile. The editor obviously wasn’t paying too close attention to yesterday’s FRONT PAGE articles as they passed his eyes, as someone got sloppy with their cutting and pasting: [..]

Did you catch that last sentence?’

`The Boulder Canyon home of a child-sex offender found dead with his wife Saturday of apparent suicides may become a bird sanctuary, with a parrot named Greeny the chief beneficiary of the couple’s estate.

Then again, their assets could go to a family friend who apparently turned over to the Boulder County coroner a handwritten note from the couple.’

`Minnesota voters, who eight years ago elected a former professional wrestler as their governor, may find a self-proclaimed vampire on the ballot for the office this year.

“Politics is a cut-throat business,” said Jonathan “The Impaler” Sharkey, who said he plans to announce his bid for governor on Friday on the ticket of the Vampyres, Witches and Pagans Party. [..]

Minnesota voters, who eight years ago elected a former professional wrestler as their governor, may find a self-proclaimed vampire on the ballot for the office this year.

“Politics is a cut-throat business,” said Jonathan “The Impaler” Sharkey, who said he plans to announce his bid for governor on Friday on the ticket of the Vampyres, Witches and Pagans Party. [..]

Sharkey also pledged to execute convicted murders and child molesters personally by impaling them on a wooden pole outside the state capitol.

Sharkey told the Minneapolis Star Tribune that he’s a vampire “just like you see in the movies and TV.”‘

`This NeXT workstation (a NeXTcube) was used by Tim Berners-Lee as the first Web server on the World Wide Web. Today, it is kept in Microcosm, the public museum at the Meyrin site of CERN, in the Canton of Geneva, Switzerland. [..]

The label on the cube itself has the following text: “This machine is a server. DO NOT POWER IT DOWN!!”‘

`Vandals took apart dozens of supermarket trolleys in the mistaken belief they contained £1 coins. [..]

They took apart the handles of each trolley before stacking them in a neat pile in a black bin bag left nearby.

Police believe they did not realise the £1 coins are returned when shoppers take the trolleys back. [..]

A Durham Police spokesman said: “We can only guess that those responsible have never used a supermarket trolley before, otherwise they would know where the money goes.”‘

`Sometimes you will see entertainers on the streets who make little poodles out of balloons. Some street entertainers can create several figures but very often their repertoire is limited. Because of this shortage of many street entertainers’ possible sculptures you could think that this skill is difficult to learn. That is not true. Within a couple of minutes the skill of the ‘poodle knot’ can be learned. The knotting techniques for more complicated structures can be learned quickly: After a couple of days in which you practise knotting for about one hour, you are able to model complex structures. Modelling balloons can very well be employed to visualise complex chemical structures and could therefore be used by professors and lecturers at universities or teachers at schools for a better presentation and explanation.’

`A 20-year-old man has filed a civil lawsuit in California against Michael Jackson claiming the pop star sexually molested him on different occasions between the ages of two and 14. [..]

The man, who filed the lawsuit in October, also claims that he was subjected to “unnecessary cosmetic procedures.” Mattern claims to have photos of his client “with these red lips just like you see on Mr. Jackson and a big old cleft chin, which he didn’t have previously.”’

`Welcome to the explosive demolition industry’s worldwide source for news and information on building implosions, blowdowns and all other types of structural blasting projects.

Implosionworld.com publishes news, feature articles and non-proprietary technical information. In addition, there’s the award-winning photography captured by Protec Documentation Services as well as many outside contributors. Throughout this website, you’ll find images designed to capture the essence of each unique project, as we work to present an insightful look into the world of explosive demolition with perspective and integrity.’

`Nicky Taylor, 39, is stumbling around a nightclub dance floor in the early hours of the morning, clutching a bottle of Smirnoff Ice.

In five hours, she has drunk equal to four bottles of wine in a potentially fatal mix of cocktails, spirits and beers. [..]

This ugly scene is not a typical night for Nicky. In an experiment for a British TV documentary, the single mother spent a month matching the bingers drink-for-drink to see what it did to her body and mind.

Over 30 days, going out five nights a week, Nicky consumed a staggering 516 units of alcohol — 17.2 units a day. Guidelines say women should drink no more than two or three units a day, and a maximum of 14 a week.’

with pre- and post-binge photos.

`The industry is honing in on a compromise proposal for the contentious IEEE 802.11n next generation WLAN standard, and a deal could be struck next week at the task group’s meeting in Hawaii. [..]

802.11n is predicated on MIMO (Multiple Input, Multiple Output) techniques, and much of the technology developed by Airgo Networks, to boost bandwidth by an order of magnitude above the standard of today’s Wi-Fi networks. The technique makes use of “multi-path” interference that might once have been minimised to drive up the network’s range.’

‘The Weishampel Exchange was created in 1996 on board of a ship patrolling the coast of California. The act, while disturbing, is catching on like fire through the homosexual and transgendered communities along the West Coast, as well as the DC area.

A Weishampel Exchange is a sexual practice in which two men stand, facing each other. Their phalli are connected by use of a water pipe from urethra to urethra. There are two variations: the traditional Weishampel Exchange refers to the act of one man ejaculating through the pipe, into the recipient’s urethra. Thus “exchanging” semen from the ejaculate traveling down the pipe. The DC Weishampel Exchange is a more recent variation, in which both men simultaneously ejaculate, creating an exciting battle of pressure.’

Update: seems wikipedia took the article away. Good thing I copied the bulk of the text before they did. 🙂 Otherwise this important piece of knowledge would have invariably been lost to the ages..

`A man was jailed on assault charges after a prosecutor, police officer and courtroom bailiff became seriously ill after shaking hands with him.

During a December 21 court appearance on a traffic charge, John Ridgeway pulled out a vial of liquid, rubbed his hands with the contents and insisted on shaking hands with the three people, authorities said.

All of them got sick within an hour, suffering from nausea, headaches, numbness and tingling that lasted about a day. Two sought treatment at a hospital.’

`DNA 11 creates abstract art from a sample of your DNA. Each custom art piece is as original as you are and is created on the highest quality canvas. Available in multiple color schemes and sizes.’

`A stolen car that had a kidnapped baby and a cell phone inside has become the center of a new controversy.

The parents of the kidnapped baby are outraged that the phone that could have been used to find the baby was not. [..]

When the parents called 911 they also realized that the father’s Sprint cell phone with GPS locator technology was also in the car.

NBC4 reported that Sprint wouldn’t provide a location to the parents or to the deputies.

“The deputies were told that Sprint had the location of the vehicle but that they could not disclose it to them because they needed to pay the $25 fee for a subpoena or fill out some forms,” said Stephanie.

Almost 2 ½ hours later a passer-by spotted the SUV abandoned a mile away.’

`Three British tourists were allegedly terrorised in the Gold Coast hinterland by a man vowing to kill Muslims in a bizarre attack reminiscent of the Sydney race riots and the horror movie Wolf Creek.

The tourists hid in a rainforest in fear of their lives after 41-year-old Shane Robert Stephens chased them along a perilous mountain road, trying several times to run their car off the edge, the Southport Magistrates Court heard yesterday.

Mr Stephens then stabbed the tyres on their rented convertible, slashed the hood, tore off the rear number plate and ripped out wiring and spark plugs, prosecutor Peta Eyschen told the court.

Opposing a bail application by the accused, Senior Constable Eyschen said Mr Stephens had referred to the three British men as “Lebanese”.’

`There is a new breed of weaponry fast approaching — and at the speed of light, no less. They are labeled “directed-energy weapons,” and they may well signal a revolution in military hardware — perhaps more so than the atomic bomb. [..]

After more than two decades of research, the United States is on the verge of deploying a new generation of weapons that discharge beams of energy, such as the Airborne Laser and the Active Denial System, as well as the Tactical High Energy Laser, or THEL.’

`”This is a truly historical meeting of the established and new media,” said Les Moonves, the head of CBS, about his network’s new video partnership with Google. Um, no, Les. So far, it’s just a really crap web site.

If, like us, you expected the new and improved Google Video service to rival something like Apple’s iTunes store, then do yourself a favor and don’t visit the Google shop for a few months. Google has done nothing to celebrate its unique access to shows such as CSI, Survivor and Star Trek. Instead, the company has buried CBS’s shows beneath a dismal interface wrapped in a shambles of a delivery mechanism. [..]

Take CSI, for example. If you highlight it, only one show appears at the time of writing – an episode called “Werewolves.” Even MacGyver gets five episodes.’

`Finally, it has started. People have begun to speak of impeaching President George W. Bush–not in hushed whispers but openly, in newspapers, on the Internet, in ordinary conversations and even in Congress. As a former member of Congress who sat on the House Judiciary Committee during the impeachment proceedings against President Richard Nixon, I believe they are right to do so.

I can still remember the sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach during those proceedings, when it became clear that the President had so systematically abused the powers of the presidency and so threatened the rule of law that he had to be removed from office. As a Democrat who opposed many of President Nixon’s policies, I still found voting for his impeachment to be one of the most sobering and unpleasant tasks I ever had to undertake. None of the members of the committee took pleasure in voting for impeachment; after all, Democrat or Republican, Nixon was still our President.

At the time, I hoped that our committee’s work would send a strong signal to future Presidents that they had to obey the rule of law. I was wrong.’

Long article, makes a good case for bringing George “War Criminal” Bush to justice.

`A spider that nested in the ear of a Swedish woman was discovered and removed alive after 27 days.

The black spider, “the size of a thumbnail”, crept into the woman’s ear while she was sleeping and went undiscovered for almost a month, Swedish tabloid Expressen reported Wednesday.

The woman, whose name was not disclosed, told the paper that she at first experienced “a slight loss of hearing” and assumed that she had a build-up of wax.

But when she heard “a scratching sound” in her ear she decided to go to the pharmacy to buy a cleanser to wash out her ear cavity.’

`Two clerks in Pennsylvania attacked a knife-wielding thief in the store and seriously injured him with baseball bats, according to a Local 6 News report. [..]

Surveillance video at the store showed a man in a black hood approaching the counter at the gas station before getting hit with the bat by employee Kuldip Singh.

Singh and his co-worker then hit the man repeatedly in the head.’

with video.

`Roadshow Films denies claims that it will not be releasing Brokeback Mountain in regional areas of Far North Queensland.

The company said today that its release strategy for the controversial film – which features a gay relationship between two cowboys played by Heath Ledger and Jake Gyllenhaal – mirrors the United States and is in line with many other up market films in Australia. [..]

Earlier Townsville-based Colin Edwards told the Ten Network: “We have a strong western influence up this way in our gay community.

“We have gay property owners, jackaroos, jillaroos. They really do exist and they really do fall in love.” [..]

Federal MP Bob Katter, whose Kennedy electorate in north Queensland takes in industries such as sugar cane, cattle, sheep and dairy farming, was unconcerned.

“Maybe there are some (gay cowboys) out there but I’ve never heard of ’em,” he said.’

`Luca “Lazylegz” Patuelli was born with arthrogryposis, a disorder that affects his bone structure and muscular growth from the waist down. He has been break dancing since the age of 15.’

(14.5meg Quicktime)

`Today and tomorrow every 8-year-old in the state of New York will take a test. It’s part of George Bush’s No Child Left Behind program. The losers will be left behind to repeat the third grade. Try it yourself. This is from the state’s actual practice test. Ready, class? [..]

And here’s one of the four questions:

“The story says that in 1999, the sisters could not seem to lose at doubles tennis. This probably means when they played

A two matches in one day
B against each other
C with two balls at once
D as partners”

OK, class, do you know the answer? (By the way, I didn’t cheat: there’s nothing else about “doubles” in the text.) [..]

Now, you tell me, class, which kids are best prepared to answer the question about “doubles tennis”? The 8-year-olds in Harlem who’ve never played a set of doubles or the kids whose mommies disappear for two hours every Wednesday with Enrique the tennis pro?’

`Norway is planning to build a “doomsday vault” inside a mountain on an Arctic island to hold a seed bank of all known varieties of the world’s crops.

The Norwegian government will hollow out a cave on the ice-bound island of Spitsbergen to hold the seed bank.

It will be designed to withstand global catastrophes like nuclear war or natural disasters that would destroy the planet’s sources of food.’

‘A small-town rumor that sparked world-wide interest about a mouse burning down a house has been found to be untrue.

After 81-year-old Chano Mares’s house burned down Saturday in Fort Sumner, news services picked up the quirky story. [..]

“It’s really humorous more than anything that a mouse burned down the house,” he told KOAT-TV in Albuquerque. The mouse was dead when it hit the burning leaves.

Mares said he trapped and killed the critter and tossed it on the fire.

The flames, he said, probably reached his house because they were driven by high winds.’

follow-up to Vengeful mouse sets house ablaze.

`Clarksville Police are searching for three men they say kidnapped, raped, robbed and held captive a 79-year-old woman for six hours after she attempted to walk into a Madison Street pharmacy.

The woman told police she was approached at about 3:30 p.m. Monday by a knife-wielding man and forced into the back seat of her bronze 1989 Ford Escort, according to an incident report by Detective Sean Averitt.

Two other men got into the back seat with her, and the first man drove away in her car. She was ordered to undress before being sexually assaulted and forced to smoke crack cocaine, Averitt wrote.’

`Fetuses do not count as passengers when it comes to determining who may drive in the carpool lane, a judge has ruled.

Candace Dickinson was fined $367 for improper use of a carpool lane, but contended her unborn child qualified to use the lane. Motorists who use the lanes normally must carry at least one passenger during weekday rush hours.’

`Goal 1: Spend an entire year at Walt Disney World and record every second of it for you to see.

Goal 2: Begin building the world’s largest Disney collection (there’s more to this – see below).

Goal 3: Not go insane.’

`Wildlife researchers have found new evidence that Arctic polar bears, already gravely threatened by the melting of their habitat because of global warming, are being poisoned by chemical compounds commonly used in Europe and North America to reduce the flammability of household furnishings like sofas, clothing and carpets.

A team of scientists from Canada, Alaska, Denmark and Norway is sounding the alarm about the flame retardants, known as polybrominated diphenyls, or PBDEs, saying that significant deposits have recently been found in the fatty tissues of polar bears, especially in eastern Greenland and Norway’s Svalbard islands.’