moonbuggy

Ken Lee.. tulibu dibu douchoo..

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‘PieSpy is an IRC bot that monitors a set of IRC channels. It uses a simple set of heuristics to infer relationships between pairs of users. These inferrences allow PieSpy to build a mathematical model of a social network for any channel. These social networks can be drawn and used to create animations of evolving social networks.’

I’ve been playing with an artificial intelligence bot lately. It sits in IRC all day long, learns how to use words, and then pretends to be a person. It’s not very clever yet. 🙂

To give you an idea of how intelligent it is, today I’ve had the most sensible conversation with it that it’s ever had:

<moonbuggy> moonb0rg, what do you think about donkeys?
<moonb0rg> fucking donkeys?
<moonbuggy> moonb0rg, well, donkeys in general.
<moonb0rg> its all about donkeys digressin
<moonbuggy> moonb0rg, you think donkeys often digress?
<moonb0rg> sir, you fuck donkeys

Fun stuff. 🙂

‘A Melbourne pub has come under fire for offering free drinks to women who remove their underwear.

The Saint Hotel in St Kilda is promoting a night called No Undie Sundie – an event where woman are encouraged to remove their underwear and hang it over the bar, to receive a $50 drink voucher.

The promotion, which has been labelled as ‘sexist’ and ‘irresponsible,’ also offers women who flash their bras and underwear to bar staff, free drinks.

Not only has the event sparked criticism from sexual assault groups, liquor licensing authorities have decided to launch an investigation.

“The Saint is really pushing the barriers,” Liquor Licensing Victoria director Sue Maclellan told News Ltd.’

Funny tho. 🙂

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‘I originally wrote this story as a reply in one of those “funny drinking stories” threads a couple of months ago. It is a very embarrassing story about me when I was a stupid teenager, not that much different from a lot of people’s drinking stories, but with a twist of lemon. Lots of people seemed to like it, so I thought I would illustrate and narrate the story in its own thread for maximum hilarity.

This all happened when I was 18 years old. I had dropped out of highschool twice by this point, ditched a lot of my friends because I was a selfish idiot and generally didn’t give a gently caress about anything. I hardly ever ate anything and was skinny as gently caress, showered maybe once every three days, took a poo poo load of drugs and smoked like a chimney. I didn’t have any prospects for the future. I just followed every impulse I had. I stole hundreds of dollars of stuff from the gas station I worked at. I stole poo poo from my parents. I shop lifted. I’m sure lots of people have been through a phase like this and I feel very sorry for all of you.’

‘Left to its own devices, TATP can decompose to oxygen or ozone and acetone. However, TATP is so unstable that it can spontaneously explode in an unpredictable and catastrophic manner.

TATP is especially dangerous because it is constrained in a ring like structure, the carbon and methane groups which are shown in gray and white in the images below do not allow for the elimination of the unstable extra oxygen atoms and the retention of the ring like structure at the same time. When the rings of TATP fall apart the rearrangement is necessarily wholesale and dramatic.

The mixing solvents like acetone and peroxides like hydrogen peroxide happens mistakenly on occasion in laboratories. On this occasional basis the inherent and dangerous instability of TATP is rediscovered inadvertently and explosively in a refluxing vessel or a when a precipitate is being dried in an oven. If you work in a laboratory, be very careful when working with peroxides.’

‘It is the baby turtle that proves two heads really are better than one.

While its siblings grow at a the usual steady pace, this tiny creature is speeding ahead.

The reason for its extraordinary growth spurt is simple: having two heads mean it eats twice as fast. [..]

Water World spokesman Jimmy Hu said: ‘We got it two weeks ago and it’s growing fast, probably because it can eat twice as fast as the others.

‘It was mixed among many other turtles and we only discovered it this week.’

Mr Hu added: ‘It’s very rare to see a turtles with two heads, we plan to keep it and raise it carefully for future research.”

‘Doctors treating a 14 year old boy from India were shocked to find a 2cm long fish had “slipped” up his penis and into his bladder.

The patient, who was admitted to hospital with complaints of pain, dribbling urine and acute urinary retention spanning a 24-hour period, gave an interesting explanation.

Details of the case, which was documented in The Internet Journal of Urology, have revealed that the patient claimed that the fish “slipped” into his penis while he was maintaining his aquarium.’

‘Police in Somerset County are trying to figure out how a radio tower went missing in Windber. Police say a group of people had a very thorough plan to get all 120 feet of steel and copper down from the old Windber radio tower.

Police believe the thieves threw cables over the guidelines of the tower and yanked it down with a truck. Police also found cut bolts and torch marks on nearby grass. Police say the tower had to be cut into small pieces in order to get it out of the wooded area, but they can’t figure out how they did it without anybody noticing.

“There’s probably a half a dozen routes that come in and out of that area. At least 20 four-wheelers and ATV riders go through there a day,” said Paint Township Police Chief Rick Skiles.

The thieves also got away with a 300-pound Penelec transformer full of copper.’

‘Hackers have broken into one of the computer networks of the Large Hadron Collider (LHC).

A group calling itself the Greek Security Team left a rogue webpage describing the technicians responsible for computer security at the giant atom smasher as “schoolkids” — but reassuring scientists that they did not want to disrupt the experiment.

The hackers gained access to a website open to other scientists on Wednesday as the LHC passed its first test, sending its protons off on their dizzying journey through time and space, close to the speed of light.

The work of the scientists was not derailed and insiders scoffed at claims that the hackers were “one step away” from the systems controlling the experiment itself. [..]’

‘Ok, this is going to sound odd, but the Starbucks near my house has like NO parking in the morning.

So, what I’m looking for is a girl who wants to crash out with me the night before, and then in the morning, ride in my car with me past the Starbucks, so I can have someone run in without me having to find parking.

I’ll pay for the Starbucks and up to one (1) baked item. No venti’s. You can leave a tip if the barista (or baristo) is worthy of one, but make sure to bring me the receipt.

I understand that we are human beings with needs, so if we should happen to let our bodies get the better of ourselves for hours and hours the night before, then there isn’t really much I can do about that, but seriously – this is about coffee – not wildly passionate, kinky, orgasm sessions, ok? OR if you could give me a good blow job while I play video games, that would be even better. [..]’

‘The Large Hadron Collider fired its first beam around the machine’s full track at 10:28 AM local time (1:36 AM Pacific time).

No actual atoms were smashed today — that won’t start for weeks — and no results are expected for months, at the earliest. Still, like first light in a telescope, the first beam in the particle accelerator is a landmark moment for a program that has spanned more than 20 years and involved tens of thousands of scientists.

“What has been shown today is that technically it all works,” said Jos Engelen, chief science officer for CERN, the European scientific research agency directing the efforts, in a live webcast from Geneva.’

Lost his mind?

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‘If there was any doubt about the terrible threat that global warming poses to humanity, then it can now be dismissed – as this shocking photograph proves that climate change is turning icebergs into giant penises.

The cockberg was photographed by Andy Rouse* in the Bransfield Strait near Antarctica.

Experts now believe** that it is only a matter of time before an armada of penis-shaped chunks begin to break off the Antarctic ice floes, and then roam the oceans wreaking havoc and luring sailors to their doom.’

‘Data from satellites and observatories around the globe show a jet from a powerful stellar explosion witnessed March 19 was aimed almost directly at Earth.

NASA’s Swift satellite detected the explosion – formally named GRB 080319B – at 2:13 a.m. EDT that morning and pinpointed its position in the constellation Bootes. The event, called a gamma-ray burst, became bright enough for human eyes to see. Observations of the event are giving astronomers the most detailed portrait of a burst ever recorded.

“Swift was designed to find unusual bursts,” said Swift principal investigator Neil Gehrels at NASA’s Goddard Space Flight Center in Greenbelt, Md. “We really hit the jackpot with this one.”

In a paper to appear in Thursday’s issue of Nature, Judith Racusin of Penn State University and a team of 92 coauthors report on observations across the spectrum that began 30 minutes before the explosion and followed its afterglow for months. The team concludes the burst’s extraordinary brightness arose from a jet that shot material directly toward Earth at 99.99995 percent the speed of light.’

They are the toughest animals on the planet – and now scientists have discovered that they can even survive in space.

The tiny creatures, known as tardigrades or water bears, are certainly strange-looking with their eight chubby legs, little claws and probing heads.

Some experts have compared their shape with jelly babies or moles but tardigrades they should not be judged by their ‘cute’ appearance. They are virtually indestructible – they will not die even if they are boiled, frozen, squeezed under pressure or desiccated.

In fact, they can be completely dried out for years – and then spring back to life as if nothing had happened.

Now researchers have revealed that tardigrades – which usually measure no more than a millimetre in length and live in moss – have withstood the airless extremes of space.’

‘A burglar who broke into a home just east of Fresno rubbed food seasoning over the body of one of two men as they slept in their rooms and then used an 8-inch sausage to whack the other man on the face and head before running out of the house, Fresno County sheriff’s deputies said Saturday.

Lt. Ian Burrimond, describing the crime as one of the strangest he’s ever heard of, said a suspect was found hiding in a nearby field a few minutes later and taken into custody on suspicion of residential robbery.

Deputies, he said, had no problem linking the suspect to the crime.

“It seems the guy ran out of the house wearing only a T-shirt, boxer shorts and socks, leaving behind his wallet with his ID,” Burrimond said.’

‘Chemicals in marijuana may be useful in fighting MRSA, a kind of staph bacterium that is resistant to certain antibiotics. Researchers in Italy and the U.K. tested five major marijuana chemicals called cannabinoids on different strains of MRSA (methicillin-resistant Staphylococcus aureus). All five showed germ-killing activity against the MRSA strains in lab tests.

Some synthetic cannabinoids also showed germ-killing capability. The scientists note the cannabinoids kill bacteria in a different way than traditional antibiotics, meaning they might be able to bypass bacterial resistance. At least two of the cannabinoids don’t have mood-altering effects, so there could be a way to use these substances without creating the high of marijuana. [..]

In the study, published in the Journal of Natural Products, researchers call for further study of the antibacterial uses of marijuana. There are “currently considerable challenges with the treatment of infections caused by strains of clinically relevant bacteria that show multi-drug resistance,” the researchers write.

New antibacterials are urgently needed, but only one new class of antibacterial has been introduced in the last 30 years. “Plants are still a substantially untapped source of antimicrobial agents,” the researchers conclude.’

‘I’m making a gang. It’s going to be called the “Regulators.” It’s a popular name but I don’t know of any with that name in my area so I’m going to use it. You must live in downtown DC. You must be at least 5’8. You can be smaller but you have to prove yourself to join. You don’t have to get beat up to get initiated into the gank. You should have to be down for the cause. If you’re not loyal though, I will cock glock and lay you out. That’s real talk. [..]’

Mildly amusing sorta thing. 🙂

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Good thing.. Where have you gone? You’ve been gone too long..

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it’s goin’ down.. yo the girl got a gun, best run..

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‘Here’s an interesting conundrum involving nuclear decay rates.

We think that the decay rates of elements are constant regardless of the ambient conditions (except in a few special cases where beta decay can be influenced by powerful electric fields).

So that makes it hard to explain the curious periodic variations in the decay rates of silicon-32 and radium-226 observed by groups at the Brookhaven National Labs in the US and at the Physikalisch-Technische Bundesandstalt in Germany in the 1980s.

Today, the story gets even more puzzling. Jere Jenkins and pals at Purdue University in Indiana have re-analysed the raw data from these experiments and say that the modulations are synchronised with each other and with Earth’s distance from the sun. (Both groups, in acts of selfless dedication, measured the decay rates of siliocn-32 and radium-226 over a period of many years.)

In other words, there appears to be an annual variation in the decay rates of these elements.’

‘Two “modern day Ninjas” calling themselves Shinobi Warriors on a quest to rid the area of drug users and drug dealers have been put out of business by police.

On Wednesday at 2:35 a.m. police officers approached a car parked in the left lane of Route 46 east and found two Clifton men dressed in black claiming to be Ninjas. The men were wearing tactical vests and armed with knives in sheaths at their waists along with Ninja throwing knives, Chinese throwing stars, four-pointed tacks, swords, bows and arrows and nunchucks, said detective Capt. Robert Rowan.

The two men, Jesse Trojaniak, 19, and Tadieusz Tertkiewicz, 20, told police they were “modern day Ninjas” also called Shinobi Warriors on their way to deliver warning letters to known drug dealers and drug users to stop their “impure” activities. They told police they planned to leave the letters on the front doors of these individuals they had singled out.

Their weapons, Rowan said, were to be a precaution in case they were confronted by the drug dealers.

The officers located five envelopes decorated with red Chinese designs containing the letters to be delivered. Reports show the two men had already delivered one such letter to Tertkiewicz’ 16-year-old ex-girlfriend in Clifton. Police contacted the teen and her mother and alerted them to the situation. Tertkiewicz was charged with harassment, both were charged with weapons possession.’

‘On the 22nd May 1975 (1974) I was convicted, at the Old bailey, of attempting to kidnap Her Royal Highness Princess Anne.

From the accompanying document entitled ‘Hoax Explanation’ you can see that I did not attempt to kidnap Princess Anne – the whole incident was just an elaborate hoax.

You can also see, from the document, that it is easy to prove the incident was a hoax – all you have to do is prove that the incident took place on the 20th March 1975 and not the 20th March 1974 as the authorities are asserting. This will prove that is was a hoax because it means that, when I was outside, I was living one year behind everybody else and the amount of contact Frank and his associates would have had to have with me to maintain the time deception proves that it would have been impossible for me to plan and execute a real kidnap attempt.

£1MILLION REWARD

As I am desperate to get out of Broadmoor, I am offering a £1Million reward to the first person who proves the incident was a hoax.’

‘A cat taking a nap on the roof of an ambulance woke to find itself going along on an emergency callout at speeds of up to 100km/h.

Chloe’s snooze ended in a hair-raising 13km trip from Port Douglas to Oak Beach in north Queensland with lights flashing and siren blaring all the way, The Cairns Post reported today.

Chloe’s owner and paramedic Myles White got a huge shock when an extremely distressed meow alerted him to a “goggle-eyed” cat sitting on the roof. [..]

“When I took her down, she was all fluffed up and her eyes were a bit blown out and she did a big ‘Help, get me off’ meow.”‘