‘A 52-year-old man complained only about the cold weather before walking into a diner with a five-inch knife sticking out of his chest. The unnamed man called a Warren 911 operator on Sunday night to ask that an ambulance be sent to Bray’s, an eatery in neighboring Hazel Park. He said he had been stabbed during a robbery attempt half a mile away, then walked to the restaurant and called 911 from a pay phone.
On a recording of the call, the man gives a vague description of his attacker before saying, “I’m gonna sit down at Bray’s ’cause they got a chair and it’s cold out here.”
Restaurant employee George Mirdita told The Detroit News the man calmly ordered coffee.’
‘Ok, this is going to sound odd, but the Starbucks near my house has like NO parking in the morning.
So, what I’m looking for is a girl who wants to crash out with me the night before, and then in the morning, ride in my car with me past the Starbucks, so I can have someone run in without me having to find parking.
I’ll pay for the Starbucks and up to one (1) baked item. No venti’s. You can leave a tip if the barista (or baristo) is worthy of one, but make sure to bring me the receipt.
I understand that we are human beings with needs, so if we should happen to let our bodies get the better of ourselves for hours and hours the night before, then there isn’t really much I can do about that, but seriously – this is about coffee – not wildly passionate, kinky, orgasm sessions, ok? OR if you could give me a good blow job while I play video games, that would be even better. [..]’