moonbuggy

‘A taxi driver in Denmark bit off the tip of a 48-year-old man’s finger in a brawl over how many people could fit in the cab, police said Monday.

The dispute started early Sunday morning, when a group of five men hailed a taxi in downtown Odense, a city in central Denmark.

Police said things got out of hand when the 37-year-old driver insisted he could only take four passengers. [..]’

You could easily fit five if two of them were midgets.

Remember that guy died after sneaking onto a farm and being fucked by a horse?

This is apparently the video. Absolutely not safe for work.

(1.5meg Flash video)

see it here »

`FemTone Vaginal Weights are weights that are used during Kegel exercises. FemTone Vaginal Weights are a set of five reusable, tampon-like, sterile cones of identical size and shape but of increasing weight.

FemTone weights when used during Kegel exercises (contracting the pelvic floor muscles) have been found to strengthen the pelvic floor and may improve urinary continence. Many women who utilize Vaginal Weights see marked results in trying to overcome incontinence. The FemTone Vaginal Weights are market leaders in this category. [..]

Please note that due to the nature of this product it is not returnable.’

`A sex assault trial that hung on claims of a large penis was turned into a “cheap joke” by media coverage, a superior court judge said yesterday as she found the accused guilty.

Justice Margaret Eberhard said she was disturbed after receiving calls “from afar” and was ribbed numerous times over the trial in which a man claimed he could not be guilty of rape because his penis is too big. [..]

A 22-year-old student, who can’t be identified, claimed his penis is too big to insert into an average vagina without special preparation or it causes bleeding and scarring.

A urologist brought to court a plastic model that depicted the size of the member at a semi-relaxed state, which measured 8 1/2 inches long and 6 1/2 inches in girth.’

Followup to Penis size used as defence in trial.

`The Teddy Bear with a BUTTHOLE!

Poke your finger in and listen to the antics

– 2 Modes of operation (Normal and Fart mode)’

`Nipple warmers are a wonderful novelty gift that will be talked about for ever more. Made in New Zealand from real Eco Fur – as seen in Playboy Magazine and discussed in “New Scientist”. See Below. Possum Fur Nipple warmers are a functional luxury… or a fun novelty. (place them inside bra, fur towards nipple- toasty and warm) and these are a great novelty no matter what climate you live in.’

`Grandmaster Tu Jin-Sheng, best known for his Iron Crotch, attached himself not once, but twice, to a rental moving truck and pulled it several yards across a parking lot in Fremont. In lace-up leather boots and a black tank top, the 50-year-old tied a strip of blue fabric around the base of his penis and testicles and tugged to make sure it was on tight. An assistant kicked him hard between the legs before he lashed himself to the vehicle.

He groaned, grunted and pressed against two men for resistance.

Then, slowly, the truck began to roll forward. ‘

`Security guards found Michael Plentyhorse, 18, sprawled with the dummy on the floor with his trousers and pants down.

Police spokesman Loren McManus said: “There was inappropriate activity between him and the mannequin.

“That’s the only way I know how to put it.”‘

`Rotenberg became a porn-hound back in Brooklyn Heights in the late seventies when his neighbor—an heirless man who had been hoarding prints, magazines, first editions, and pornography for decades—died. City workers hauled armloads of obviously valuable first editions out of the apartment, but they left everything else to be tossed into the trash. Already something of a pack rat, the then-26-year-old Rotenberg scavenged Cruikshank drawings, Civil War newspapers, signed Picasso lithos, and lots of erotic material. He wasn’t even into the porn at first. It was only after a friend suggested he show his finds to an editor at Screw that he realized there might be money in it.

Today, Rotenberg earns his living from pornographic books and sales on his Website, vintagenudephotos.com. Recently, a single buyer bought $1,400 worth of erotic playing cards, and Rotenberg was once offered $30,000 for a rare film by the early-twentieth-century California photographer Albert Arthur Allen.’

‘A Superior Court judge must decide whether to believe a 21-year-old accused who says he could not have committed a sexual assault because his penis is too big. [..]

Earlier in the trial, which has been in and out of court for months, a urologist testified that Beutling’s penis is in the top 5% range for size in comparison to the doctor’s other patients. [..]

The urologist showed the court a plastic model of a penis approximating the accused’s member at a semi-relaxed state, which measured 8 1/2 inches in length and 6 1/2 inches in girth.

He said a woman who has not given birth might have discomfort or tearing if she had intercourse with a penis that size, especially if she was not sexually aroused.’

‘McKinney Police Capt. Randy Roland said police had to set up a perimeter complete with police officers and a helicopter around 9 p.m. Saturday for a 911 call from a woman walking in the 3200 block of Hudson Crossing who said she thought she was being followed by a man dressed in black with a machete.

But it turned out to be a 13-year-old boy playing “Ninja” in a costume with a plastic sword.’

‘The murder of a tramp was successfully solved in Russia’s southern port city of Novorossiisk after police discovered the victim’s penis on the person of the murderer. He had cut it off and kept it as a trophy, Russian news agency Regnum reported on Tuesday.

According to the agency, police discovered the dead body of a man in a garage block. The dead man was naked and his penis had been cut off. Investigators have found out that the dead man was a local tramp known as Sniper — a nickname he got for allegedly serving in the army in Chechnya. [..]

According to the investigators’ main theory, the murder was committed out of jealousy. The victim and his killer had been drinking in the company of a young homeless woman and started fighting. The young tramp strangled Sniper and then cut off his penis which he apparently kept as a trophy.’

Some strange man rapping strange stuff. I assume he’s being ridiculous on purpose, but you never know.

(7.4meg Flash video)

see it here »

`Dr. Chopp is board certified by the American Board of Urology and joined The Urology Team in 1983. He attended medical school at The University of Minnesota. His internship and residency were both at the University of Southern California, where he served in various capacities, including adult service, general urology, and renal service. [..]

Dr. Richard (Dick) Chopp is well known in the Austin community for performing Vasectomies. [..]’

Dick Chopp. Get it? Ha ha.

[shrug] 🙂

`And, as the New York Times noted in Marvin’s obituary, Marvin chose a rather unusual way of expressing a Garp-like solidarity with his brother after the latter’s death in 1993:

“The brothers were so close that Marvin never used the pronoun “I,” much less claimed credit for a particular photo. After Morgan died of testicular cancer, Marvin had his own testicles removed.” [..]

A week later, the Times ran a correction:

“An obituary last Wednesday about Marvin Smith, a leading photographer of Harlem who worked with his identical twin, Morgan, described the closeness of the two men — it was said that they never used the pronoun “I” — and recounted an anecdote about Marvin Smith’s response to the illness that caused his brother’s death, in 1993. [..]

After the obituary appeared, Monica Smith, the daughter of Morgan Smith, told The Times that her father had had prostate cancer and that her uncle did not have his testicles removed.”‘

‘I’m selling a photo of my mom naked because she’s fuckin pissing me off. I’ll take the photo once the bids have finished. I’ll probably only get like 5 bucks but at least that’s gonna get me a beer and some pokies at the local pub.

If you wanna know what she looks like young Mother Teresa. I’m not putting her photo up on this page cause I’ll get in the shit, so when you get it you gotta promise to keep it to yourself or something.

I take no responsibility if you die when you see her.

I’ll probably take it when shes like getting outta the shower, I’m movin to England so what do I care.’

‘I’ve seen a lot of weird Japanese animation, but this is one of the weirdest. I sat my wife and kids down in front of the TV to watch it and everything started off OK. Then the raccoons came on the screen and started transforming. That was strange, but not that strange. It was then that I noticed something odd between the legs of the male raccoon characters. It wasn’t until I saw it again a few times that I realized what it was — a scrotum. I said to my wife, “Did you see that?” We both looked again and I said, “Is that what I think it is??” We then realized we had seen the first testicles shown in a Disney film. Fortunately the kids didn’t notice. But it got weirder from there.’

`Welcome to the HOTTEST site on the Web for hardcore furniture action! If you’re ready to see some hot, horny home furnishings get their freak on then you’re in the right place!! You won’t believe what our furniture will do! It’ll make you pop your springs and throw your pillows!!’

`Men have been mad about the erotically seductive scent of the vagina since time immemorial. Now you can have it anywhere, anytime – with the authentically natural vaginal fragrance VULVA Original, the sensual accelerator.’

‘Just started bustin’ rhymes, finally found my groove,
Now the SS on my jacket stands for super smooth..

And when I step into the clubs you know I’m steppin’ with style,
I raise my left hand, party people say heil..’

(7.7meg Flash video)

see it here »

`What our customers say about the SelfWipe:

“Greatly exceeded my expectations and I would recommend the SelfWipe to others.”
“The ease of use and reach ability is better than other products I’ve used.”‘

[shrug]

‘The “suspicious package” that caused Interstate 75 and Daniels Parkway to be shut for more than an hour Monday was not an explosive pipe bomb — but rather wrapped-up plastic foot-long penis.

“Someone took construction-grade plastic, molded it into a penis and wrapped it with duct tape,” said Lee County Sheriff’s Chief Deputy Charles Ferrante.

“They wrote ‘Happy Father’s Day’ on the duct tape.”‘

`For those that love to worship feet! Kaylani’s foot has long slender toes with ruby red nails. The best part is that it has a tight ribbed pussy in the heel of the shoe.’

‘Animal experts admitted yesterday they had no explanation for a spate of what appear to be canine suicides — all from the same spot.

At least five dogs have jumped to their deaths from a bridge over a burn at Overtoun House in the past six months.

In the most recent case, a woman out walking her dog watched in disbelief as her pet suddenly vaulted over the parapet and plunged 40ft to its death.’

`A Swedish woman said on Sunday that she had found a penis in a bottle of ketchup.

Viktoria Ed said she was lucky enough to discover the organ before putting the sauce on her bread rolls, unlike her husband Stefan and their children, Madeleine and Simon.

“It looked like a penis, of an adult if it’s human, and medium sized,” she said.’

`Tetris ist one of the most popular computer games of the last 20 years. Since its invention in 1985 it has found its way on almost any computer system and game console in one form or the other. With Arcade you can play Tetris with your mobile phone – on a playground 3370 m2 in size.

Whoever stands in front of Bibliothèque nationale de France can connect himself with the building by dialing +33 (1) 44 24 73 50. The current show will be interrupted and the text “TETRIS” announces that the game can begin.’

‘A conservative ringer who was given a press pass to the White House and lobbed softball questions at President Bush quit yesterday after left-leaning Internet bloggers discovered possible ties to gay prostitution. [..]

Gannon began covering the White House two years ago for an obscure Republican Web site (Talon-News.com). He was known for his friendly questions, including asking Bush at last month’s news conference how he could work with Democrats “who seem to have divorced themselves from reality.” [..]

He came under lefty scrutiny after revelations that the administration was paying conservative pundits to talk up Bush’s proposals. By examining Internet records, online sleuths at DailyKos.com figured out that his real name was Jim Guckert and he owned various Web sites, including HotMilitaryStud.com, MilitaryEscorts.com and MilitaryEscortsM4M.com.’

a lot more of Gannon here.

‘A man, who was understood to weigh around 30-stone and was believed to have been drunk, had fallen over in the vehicle and slipped between the driver’s seat and rear seat. He was wedged fast on the floor of the cab, where officers said he was being sick.

Paramedics and firefighters from nearby Whitehaven Fire Station were called out to help. A team of five firefighters took about half an hour to manhandle the man out of the vehicle.’

`Brand new invisible car. Ready for collection from London E11.

I do not know much about this vehicle, it being invisible. I have never driven this car sober, although I can assure you it is good because it always gets me home after a night out. It has never let me down, and I have never had any problems from the police. No-one will ever steal this car.’