`Seven network personality Naomi Robson and a television crew have been stopped by Indonesian authorities after attempting to enter the troubled province of Papua on tourist visas, Indonesian authorities have confirmed.
The Today Tonight current affairs show host and her four-member crew were questioned on arrival at Jayapura airport in Papua this morning after a tip-off from anonymous sources, Indonesian foreign affairs department spokesman Desra Percaya said.
The five are now expected to be deported and possibly fined and blacklisted from ever entering Indonesia, Mr Percaya said.’
‘Crew members on a Sharon Stone movie were so annoyed by her behaviour that they urinated in a bathtub before she got in it to film a scene, a new book claims.’
`Kenneth Ray Brooks marched into Centura Bank and declared: “I’m holding down the joint,” police reports record. He then “stuffed a stack of bills into his waistband and pushed the money down out of view”, and quickly exited the scene tailed by a bank employee.
Sadly, Brooks didn’t get far before a dye-pack concealed in the loot exploded. Police spokeswoman Sgt. Barbara Jones explained: “Witnesses said they could see smoke coming out of his pants.” Officers attending the scene quickly identified the perp by “his discomfort and bright red dye on both hands”.
Brooks, identified by bank employees and CCTV footage of the blag, was taken to police headquarters for questioning and later “walked very slowly to a waiting ambulance with the help of police officers and firefighters”. He then enjoyed a trip to the local hospital “as a result of possible burning injuries to his person”.’
‘Watch this kid nearly fall 100s of feet our of his seat at an amusement park. His Mom hardly seemed to notice as the boy screamed for his life.’
(3.5meg Windows media)
see it here »
`Passengers on a Canadian plane had an unsettling in-flight experience after the pilot found himself locked out of the cockpit after a trip to the toilet.
Instead of slipping back inside, the Air Canada Jazz pilot was seen banging on the door and talking to his first officer on an internal phone.
Crew members were forced to take the door off its hinges to let him back in.’
A policeman manages to shoot himself in the leg with his tazer when he tries to put it back in the holster. Then he falls over.
(960kB Windows media)
see it here »
`Don’t even fucking say a word. I like potato chips, and can’t eat them very much or I’ll get fat.
I tried out these Pringles Fat-Free chips because they were super low-cal. BBQ flavor. the fuck.
The can said they had 70 calories per serving, which meant the whole can had 490 calories inside total. I could munch through a can in a day with my lunch, dinner, etc. So I got several cans, and began enjoying one a day for the past four days. But what they dont fucking tell you…
Except in tiny print you cant read without a fucking electron microscope
…is that the primary ingredient is something called “olean” which I have since learned is Latin for “Unwashable & Indestructible Ass Grease.”‘
‘This guy is such a great friend. He decided to sacrifice his Saturday afternoon to help his buddy cut down some overgrown tree branches. I think next time he wont ask for any help.’
(2meg Windows media)
see it here »
`Toppled dictator Saddam Hussein is being tormented in jail – by being forced to watch himself in South Park.
The evil tyrant is portrayed in the movie version of the cult cartoon as the Devil’s gay lover.
South Park: Bigger, Longer and Uncut was banned in Iraq on its launch in 1999 for showing Saddam as a homosexual. [..]
South Park creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone yesterday revealed Saddam is made to watch the movie “repeatedly” by the US Marines guarding him.’
`A woman has been arrested after a text message, obviously meant for someone else, ended up on the cell phone of a Broken Arrow police officer.
The officer was working a traffic shift Friday evening when he received the message wanting to know where they could get together to smoke some marijuana the sender had just purchased.
The officer responded to the message and arranged to meet the messenger at a local business. When the woman arrived, she was surprised to find out she was under arrest for possession of marijuana.’
`When Marcelino P. Castro plunged a dildo into his rectum in the wee hours of Feb. 20, he could not know it would lead to his arrest last week. But then the dildo became stuck, and Castro began a ride that took him through the UCI Medical Center’s emergency room and may land him in prison.’
‘Man this girl has some bad luck. First she gets pegged hard in the head as the catcher tries to throw out the baserunner, then she gets called out for interference!’
(1.5meg Windows media)
see it here »
`The icecap may not be the only thing shrinking in the Arctic. The genitals of polar bears in east Greenland are apparently dwindling in size due to industrial pollutants.
Scientists report this shrinkage could, in the worst case scenario, endanger polar bears there and elsewhere by spoiling their love lives and causing their numbers to peter out. [..]
The adult polar bear testicles the researchers examined were on average roughly three inches across and 1.8 ounces in weight, although they could dramatically enlarge during the height of sexual activity from January to July. Their bacula, or penis bones, were on average nearly seven inches long.’
‘A hitter for the Tigers bends back to avoid a pitch that’s a bit too inside. Unfortunately as he bends back his puts his balls right in the line of fire. At least he gets on base!’
(1.9meg Windows media)
see it here »
‘Some dude is having his buddy taping him ghost riding his car in his neighborhood. A guy walking down the street sees him and decides to steal his car.’
(4.3meg Windows media)
see it here »
`Every speed camera fine issued by the Roads and Traffic Authority since 1999 may be invalid, after a judge ruled the photos used to convict drivers were meaningless.
The decision in the Sydney District Court by Judge John Nicholson, SC, could cost the State Government hundreds of millions of dollars, said Dennis Miralis, the solicitor who won the case. [..]
He found that to be given weight as evidence the digital cameras that took the photos had to be calibrated every day. The authority calibrated its cameras once a year, Mr Miralis said.
He said every person convicted on such evidence since 1999 – when digital cameras came in – had been improperly convicted.’
‘Some dude takes a shot with his buddy defending. The shot hits the side of the goal and ricochets off the post straight into his friends face.’
(490kB Windows media)
see it here »
‘…and the other girls just keep on singing! An instant classic.’
see it here »
`Out of more than 36 million search queries that hundreds of thousands of AOL users typed into AOL’s Internet search engine from March to May, here is the term most queried: Google.
That so many customers would use one search engine to find another is among the odd truths being mined from AOL’s public release of search data. The company last week called the incident involving 658,000 users’ queries a “screw-up” and apologized. But for better or worse, the data offer the first widespread public glimpse of how people search the Internet, of what they are interested in. Of how people think.’
`A birthday party went horribly wrong yesterday when a goat at the Winnipeg Zoo was killed by its herd in front of the birthday girl.
Terry Geiger and her boyfriend had taken Geiger’s daughter, Angie, and a friend to the zoo for the six-year-old’s birthday when two Alpine ibex goats started fighting in the enclosure in front of them.
“At first it was entertaining,” Geiger said. “It was like watching the Discovery Channel but it just got worse and worse.”‘
This is a short clip from a reality TV show. One of the contestants has an unfortunate problem, and ends up sharing it with everyone else.
(8.2meg Flash video)
see it here »
`A graduate student from the University of Central Florida remains missing Saturday after he was pulled underwater by a large sea turtle, according to Local 6 News.
Officials said Boyd Lyon, 35, vanished Thursday afternoon about three miles north of the Sebastian Inlet and 400 yards out to sea, sheriff’s officials said.
The student was apparently tagging turtles as part of a UCF research project.’
`Camille has beauty and brains.
She’s a former model and a Phi Beta Kappa with a master’s in education. There’s a part of her, though, that’s not so perfect.
She smells like spoiled fish.
Camille says when she taught, students wouldn’t come near her.
“They would say things like, ‘Ew, this classroom stinks like dead fish.’ They would call me ‘Miss Fishy.'”‘
`A 32-year-old man banging on a window to get people’s attention died when the glass shattered and cut a major artery in his arm, the Sauk County Sheriff’s Department said.
Jerry Baruffi, of Pleasant Prairie, was at a family reunion at Devil’s Head Resort, said Jim Schmidt, a relative from Chicago. He pounded on a window next to the indoor pool about 10:30 p.m. Saturday when the glass shattered, he said.’
`In the course of a contract dispute, the city of Hoboken had police escort the Robotic employees from the premises just a few days before the contract between both parties was set to expire. What the city didn’t understand or perhaps concern itself with, is that they sent the company packing with its manuals and the intellectual property rights to the software that made the giant robotic parking structure work.’
‘A guy mistakenly picked up a hot iron while trying to answer a telephone call.’
(1.1meg Windows media)
see it here »
‘A man who sued the city for entering his apartment without a search warrant after he was mauled by his 450-pound pet Siberian tiger demonstrated a lot of nerve in taking the city to court, a judge said as he threw the lawsuit out. [..]
Police removed the 10-foot-long tiger, Ming, and an alligator, Al, from Yates’ East Harlem apartment. Yates served 3 1/2 months in jail after pleading guilty to reckless endangerment. [..]
Police determined that the situation was an emergency because there was a large tiger that had recently mauled a man roaming around inside an apartment, the judge said.’
`The kicker misses the ball and instead trys to launch the ball holders head.’
(4.6meg Windows media)
