‘Bad news for Coco and Blinko — children don’t like clowns and even older kids are scared of them.
The news that will no doubt have clowns shedding tears was revealed in a poll of youngsters by researchers from the University of Sheffield who were examining how to improve the decor of hospital children’s wards.
The study, reported in the Nursing Standard magazine, found all the 250 patients aged between four and 16 they quizzed disliked the use of clowns, with even the older ones finding them scary.
“As adults we make assumptions about what works for children,” said Penny Curtis, a senior lecturer in research at the university.
“We found that clowns are universally disliked by children. Some found them quite frightening and unknowable.”‘
‘A married couple who died in the Central Australian outback used the last of their water on a leaking car radiator, the sole survivor of the tragedy has told police. [..]
A ground search had been mounted to find the man and his two companions after a report was made to police about 9pm (CST) on Sunday that an overdue party was missing after setting off from the Aboriginal community of Kintore.
The man, believed to be aged between 60 and 70, told police that the Pajero station wagon they had been travelling in broke down 116km from Nyirripi two days earlier.
The group then ran out of water after using it to fill up a leaking radiator, he said.’
‘Without warning or reports of turbulence, an Air Canada flight en route to Toronto dipped and rotated violently, on early Thursday morning, causing injuries and confusion among passengers and the crew. Strangely enough, flight experts are still unsure about what caused the accident.
“What happened aboard Air Canada flight 190,” said a reporter on CBC’s The National, “can best be described as chaos.”
According to passenger accounts, the Airbus aircraft bucked and rolled side to side abruptly, hurling dishes and people through the air. “It was weird,” one passenger told the CBC. “The plane actually turned upside down without actually feeling it. There were people on the roof. Coffe and shit [was] flying all over the plane.”‘
‘A 20-year-old man is in hospital after almost losing an arm in a traffic incident at Bunbury in Western Australia.
Police say the man was a passenger in a utility when his left arm was sideswiped by a passing vehicle at the intersection of Blair Street and Sandridge Road.
The man had been waving to two girls who were washing a car at a local car wash.
Police are appealing for witnesses to the incident which occurred around 8:30pm AWDT.’
Also: Surgeons save ‘waving man’s’ arm
‘Shinzo Abe would like the world to know that he did not resign last year because of failed policies or election losses. The real reason reason for his resignation was crippling diarrhea that forced him to go to the toilet 30 times a day:
Abe said he has been struck by ulcerative colitis, a bowel illness caused by ulcers, at least once a year since he was 17. [..]
“To mention an indelicate matter, I rushed to the lavatory after having keen abdominal pains and saw the basin all red with tremendous bleeding,” he said.
“Bleeding causes slight anaemia. More than anything else, though, you feel depressed as you see fresh blood every time you go to the toilet,” he said in an article contributed to the major conservative monthly Bungei Shunju.
Abe said the illness usually made him “feel the need to relieve my bowels every 30 minutes.” [..]
“The need to go to the toilet many times a day hampers election and other political activities very much,” he said, adding his wife, Akie, once made a tearful plea to him to quit his political career.’
‘Some big guy picks up a cheerleader and holds her over his head but he loses balance and not only drops her but falls on top of her as well.’
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see it here »
‘A Polish man got the shock of his life when he visited a brothel and spotted his wife among the establishment’s employees.
Polish tabloid Super Express said the woman had been making some extra money on the side while telling her husband she worked at a store in a nearby town.
“I was dumfounded. I thought I was dreaming,” the husband told the newspaper on Wednesday.
The couple, married for 14 years, are now divorcing, the newspaper reported.’
‘A 20-year-old Burleson man was arrested Friday night after police say he drove a pickup truck into a home while intoxicated.
Bryan Scott Moron was taken into custody after he lost control of a white Chevrolet truck and struck a mailbox on Parkridge Blvd., then continued ahead and drove into a home.
The arresting officer said Moron failed sobriety tests. The arrest report shows Moron had a blood alcohol level of more than twice the legal limit.
Moron reportedly works as a server at a local restaurant.’
He’s probably lucky they didn’t give his a shot of the taser aswell. That seems to be all the rage these days. 🙂
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see it here »
‘Two southern New Mexico men are recovering after accidentally shooting themselves while trying to trace a loaded .357-caliber Magnum as a pattern for a tattoo.
The Otero County Sheriff’s Department identified the men as Robert Glasser and Joey Acosta. Both are 22.
The sheriff’s department says deputies responded to the shooting in Chaparral on Thursday evening, but Glasser and Acosta were already on their way to a hospital in nearby El Paso.
Authorities say Glasser was struck in the hand when the gun accidentally went off. Acosta was hit in the left arm. The injuries were non-life threatening.’
‘I Am Not My Brother’s Keeper’
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‘A 32-year-old Californian whose rental car got smashed by a Metro-North train last night was issued a minor summons for causing the fiery crash that stranded railroad commuters for hours.
Bo Bai, a computer technician from Sunnyvale who said he was merely trusting his car’s global positioning system when he steered onto the tracks, was cited for obstructing a railroad crossing, officials said this afternoon. [..]
“As the car is driving over the tracks, the GPS system tells him to turn right, and he turns right onto the railroad tracks,” said Brucker. “That’s how it happened.”
Brucker added, “He tried to stop the train by waving his arms, which apparently was not totally effective in slowing the train.”‘
‘A New Zealand woman who pulled apart a Christmas cracker got more than the party hat and joke she had expected, finding a dead mouse.
Betty Lawrence, a grandmother from the South Island city of Invercargill, made the discovery sitting down to Christmas dinner with 20 relatives, The Southland Times newspaper reported.
“I had said to my granddaughter ‘what’s the smell’ and we couldn’t work it out until we pulled the cracker,” Lawrence told the newspaper, after finding a dead and partially decomposed mouse.
The discovery curbed her enthusiasm for the Christmas meal.’
‘Luther Ricks and his wife worked most of their lives at a steel foundry in Ohio. Not trusting of banks, they say they’ve lived frugally, and managed to save more than $400,000 over the years, which they kept in a safe in their home.
Last summer, two burglars broke into Ricks’ home. He shot and killed one of them. Police determined he acted in self-defense, and cleared him of any criminal wrongdoing. But local police did find a small amount of marijuana in Ricks’ home, which Ricks says he uses to manage the pain of his arthritis and a hip replacement surgery. Ricks was never charged for the marijuana. But finding it in his home was enough for city police to confiscate Ricks and his wife’s life savings under drug war asset forfeiture laws. Oddly enough, the FBI then stepped in, and claimed the money for itself.’
‘A 24-year-old American man is suing a Burger King restaurant – claiming he found a condom in his Whopper.
Van Miguel Hartless alleges he bit into the burger and found the unwrapped contraceptive under a piece of lettuce.
“My third bite into the burger, it was just a foreign taste,” he said. “It was a very sour, bitter sort of taste. It almost had a numbing sensation.
“As I went to bite down a little harder, I felt a rubber grind in between my teeth. I saw it half in my mouth, half hanging out.
“It was an immediate sick-to-my-stomach type of thing.”‘
‘A woman stabbed her husband with a kitchen knife following an argument that began when she accused him of opening a Christmas present early, authorities said Friday.
Misty Johnson, 34, was arrested and charged with aggravated assault and battery, a felony, and misdemeanor domestic battery. Her husband, Shawn Fay Johnson, 34, was treated at a hospital for a wound to the chest, police said. [..]
Authorities said Shawn Johnson called 911 just before 1 a.m. Wednesday to report that his wife had stabbed him. He told police that his wife started arguing with him over his opening a Christmas present, according to court records.
As the argument escalated, Misty Johnson accused her husband of having an affair, authorities said. Police found a marriage license in the couple’s apartment stating they were married in late September.
Police Detective David Thompson said he didn’t know what the present was, or if it was intended for the husband.’
‘A convicted criminal has moved in with a married couple against their wishes after giving their address in court as his home.
Shane Sims, 19, has spent the last few days living with Brenda and Robert Cole after he was sentenced to a week’s curfew for breaching a supervision order.
But the couple claim the first they knew about it was when Sims, a friend of their daughter, moved in on Thursday – followed by security contractors who put a box in a bedroom to monitor his movements with an ankle tag.
Mrs Cole, 47, said: ‘It’s turned our lives upside down. He’s taken over the whole place. He sprawls across the sofa and he’s always in the bathroom when you need it. It’s an absolute disgrace. They’ve let a criminal come into our home and there is nothing we can do about it.”
‘God wants me dead. I pissed him off. Pissed him off good. I don’t know what sent him over the edge. Maybe it was my off-colour, sacreligious sense of humour. Maybe it was the bilby I drowned in a duffel bag. Whatever it was, one thing is clear – the great skyfairy wants hardcore vengeance, and he wants it now. Let’s educate you on whats happened so far. If you don’t want to read, I’ll summarise it for you in the next two words.
Get lost.’
It’s a long story, but read it all the way to the end if you’re gonna read it. Or you’ll miss this bit:
“AIE YE DEMONS, I DELIVER THEE UNTO HELL! …BURN IN ETERNAL DAMNATION!” 🙂
‘(+ware) I rear-ended a car this morning. So there we are alongside the road and
(+ware) slowly the driver gets out of the car . . . and you know how you just get sooo
(+ware) stressed and life seems to get funny?
(+ware) Well, I could NOT believe it . . he was a DWARF! He storms over to my car,
(+ware) looks up at me and says, “I AM NOT HAPPY!”
(+ware) So, I look down at him and say, “Well, which one are you then?”… and
(+ware) THAT’S when the fight started . .’
‘On the slaughterhouse floor at Quality Pork Processors Inc. is an area known as the “head table,” but not because it is the place of honor. It is where workers cut up pigs’ heads and then shoot compressed air into the skulls until the brains come spilling out.
But now the grisly practice has come under suspicion from health authorities.
Over eight months from last December through July, 11 workers at the plant in Austin, Minn. — all of them employed at the head table — developed numbness, tingling or other neurological symptoms, and some scientists suspect inhaled airborne brain matter may have somehow triggered the illnesses.
The use of compressed air to remove pig brains was suspended at Quality Pork earlier this week while authorities try to get to the bottom of the mystery. [..]
Five of the workers — including Kruse, who has been told she may never work again — have been diagnosed with chronic inflammatory demyelinating polyneuropathy, or CIDP, a rare immune disorder that attacks the nerves and produces tingling, numbness and weakness in the arms and legs, sometimes causing lasting damage.’
‘This was the incredible scene after a car cartwheeled more than 100ft through the air before embedding itself in a first-floor flat.
John Gordon’s Volvo took off after hitting a tree on a roundabout and flew until it crashed into the flats 15ft off the ground and facing backwards.
The car smashed into a lounge where 19-year-old Laura Stevens had been a few seconds earlier. [..]
Engineers had to spend three hours dismantling the wall of the flats in Werrington, Peterborough, before they could remove the car.
Mr Gordon, from Peterborough, hit the roundabout at around 9.10am on Saturday, clipped a tree and bounced before being catapulted into the air.
His car cartwheeled so it entered Miss Stevens’s flat backwards, sending debris flying on to the floor.’
‘A surgery meant to reverse a colostomy on a Dover man went horribly wrong last year, resulting in fecal mater being discharged from his penis and urine passing through his colon, according to a lawsuit filed in Superior Court.
During the procedure, the suit alleges doctors at Kent General Hospital improperly stapled the colon to the bladder instead of the rectal stump. This left the patient with diarrhea, as well as gas and liquid stool passing from his penis.
The man was taken to Christiana Hospital 12 days later to have the procedure corrected, but not until after much suffering and embarrassment as well as “disfigurement and disability,” the suit claims. It also affected life at home with his wife, who also is suing the three doctors involved in the allegedly botched procedure, Surgical Associates P.A. and Bayhealth Medical Center Inc.’
‘Cashier: How are you?
Customer: Do you want the honest answer?
Cashier: Yes.
Customer: I feel like the business end of a donkey. I am extremely hungover and did a mountain of cocaine last night. Now I have to make dinner for a 68-year-old gay artist who is trying to fuck me.
Cashier: I’m… sorry.
Customer: And the woman I love is in another state pregnant with her ex-boyfriend’s baby, and I wish the baby was mine. And I’m sleeping with a dominatrix. And it’s all true.’
